Garner, Abigail: Families Like Mine

Children of gay Parents Tell It Like it Is

What is it really like to grow up with gay parents?

Abigail Garner was five years old when her mother and father divorced and her dad came out as gay. Growing up immersed in gay culture, she now calls herself a "culturally queer" heterosexual woman. As a child, she often found herself in the middle of the political and moral debates surrounding lesbian, gay, bisexual, and transgender (LGBT) parenting. At the age of twenty-two, she began to speak publicly about her family and has since become a nationally recognized advocate for the estimated 10 million children growing up with LGBT parents. The creator of FamiliesLikeMine.com, Garner has written a deeply personal and much-needed book about gay parenting, from the seldom-heard perspective of grown children raised in these families.

Based on eight years of activism, combined with interviews with more than fifty sons and daughters, Families Like Mine debunks the anti-gay myth that these children grow up damaged and confused. At the same time, Garner's book refutes the popular pro-gay sentiment that these children turn out "just like everyone else." In addition to the typical stresses of growing up, the unique pressures these children face are not due to their parents' sexuality, but rather to homophobia and prejudice. Using a rich blend of journalism and memoir, Garner offers empathetic yet unapologetic opinions about the gifts and challenges of being raised in families that are often labeled "controversial."

As more LGBT people are pursuing parenthood and as the visibility of gay parenting is rapidly increasing, many of the questions about these families focus on the "best interests" of their children. Eloquent and sophisticated, Families Like Mine addresses these questions, providing an invaluable insider's perspective for LGBT parents, their families, and their allies.

Compellingly written…this should quickly become a mainstay resource for many family service agencies and public libraries serving LGBT patrons – American Library Association

Many people will find this a helpful book; its all-encompassing approach should draw in not only children of LGBT parents, but also friends and family, teachers, therapists and clergy who work with them. –Publishers Weekly

Children of gay parents shoot from the hip in Abigail Garner’s indispensible Families Like Mine. – Vanity Fair

Families Like Mine [is] a sort of Feminine Mystique about the children of gay parents, articulating their pride and their struggles with homophobia but also the grievances they have with their families - NY Times Magazine

Smart and impassioned…This is the new essential reading for LGBT families - Advocate

Garner offers humorous and often poignant insights not only into the joys and complexities of gay families, but the hardships the children in particular endure because of social resistance to their parents’ union- Publishers Weekly